Just needing to vent

When it rains, it pours! Something that was said to appy to times such as mine. I finally got the CD-R I needed to put start up Boot Camp Beta, only to realize I didn't have a product code number. I bought WIndows XP Servicd pack 2 in 2004 online and got the backup disk. It had the number on the package which has now gone missing. Luckily my neighbor had an extra product code that he was willing to give me. Thank God for good neighbors! If only he did not decide that today was the day he is going to get wood, leaving me hovering near the window in hopes to see him on the street.

My CIOS 110 class (Managing, maintaining and troubleshooting software specializing in Windows XP) still looks like its being flushed down the toilet. The things I need to do are about as comfortable as it would be to jam your hand into the toilet bowl to retrieve what you need to save, clean it up and yourself and see if everything still works good. I spent a few hours updating my laptop to make sure everything is up-tp-date. I spent a whole day trying to download the program (which takes just over 5 hours to download without any outages). I had an outage just after it reached halfway, if not two-thirds of the way. So I started over, only to get "disk failed to burn." I was still optimistic, and with good reason - the dividends are just around the bend and I will finally be able to get a couch.

It must be my time to be through the wringer or mud or whatever dirty rotten smelly part of luck or fate or destiny or cake/bed I made that I now have to eat/sleep in... yea - it felt about as bad as it sounds. The bank called me about the loan I helped my brother get for a snowmachine back in 2003. I am normally really good about telling others that I have enough financial troubles being a single mother of three without adding to it. I had a pretty good credit, bought a 4 wheeler a while back, and was able to help my second-youngest brother with a loan for a computer, which he paid and just had the account in my name. So my second-oldest brother (I have 4 brothers all younger than I, all in a row) comes up to me and says he needs help getting a loan for a snow machine in 2003. "We need it so I can get wood. I will get some for you too if the loan is approved. We will put one dividend down and pay the rest - I am working and my wife is working, but we can't get the loan on our own." Red flags? YES, for me too. I said "I don't think they will let me, I might be going back to college soon." This is where one would see the pleading eye syndrome and hear the words "Just try it, it won't hurt. You won't have to pay anything." Smell trouble heading my way? Big understatement. To make an already long version of my short story I paid. Now the bank is taking my dividend to pay off the rest of my loan. Yea, I cried, I called him. I got excuses. I was asked to call my parents in Bethel to get them to put a for sale sign up to sell his truck (that my parents have been using since June when my brother came for a funeral and stayed.) I am stuck with the remains of a snow machine that guzzles gas and needs more parts, which neither me nor my family has been able to use that no one wants to buy for anywhere close to the money that was taken from my funds.... sad - I don't feel like I have hit rock bottom yet because I still see so many other challenges this semester. I need prayers, I need strength..... At least now for alll y'all out there you can say "I know I have it bad, but not as bad as she does." That will be my silver lining -knowing that no one else has to go through what I am going through. Those brght sides of life sure are shrinking.